get a load of this nerd lmfao
a few weeks ago, i watched the new alien movie (along with the oldest one)- and i can't tell if they've hightened my fear of space and quiet or only made my curiosity grow. recently i've found some fascination in exploring what brings a fear to light and how it can be interpreted, both negatively and positively. as well as this i (today) read a short story (written about 1950) creating a narriative of a world previously occupied by modern humanity (automated homes and robotic interior), which was wiped out by an undisclosed war that happened abruptly. The story follows the final 'functional' day of the long since abandoned house then let off by a fire and a large explosion. when i read it, the story led me to question more things than i thought it would. The story was intended to show how the world would continue its natural cycle of life, even without human cooperation. reading that story from the perspective of a human left me with a feeling of desperate quiet and an obligation to help. but i knew i couldnt. That feeling of a quiet void with no way of escape or change, knowing that the event you are witnessing had no greater affect on anything, or anybody, but you.
at the end of both the first and most recent alien moves (1979-romulus), the main character is shown on their quiet journey back to wherever they came from before their voyage. nobody to tell about what they saw, and nobody to believe. that feeling of a mental void paired with the severe grief and loss of your own crewmates leaves such a sinkhole in my chest. everything is too still and there's not a sound coming from the lightyears of(next to) nothing before you.
that short story i read before was based off of the 1918 poem titled "there will come soft rains" (its likely more well known that im thinking, because i read it for a school assignment). the way the story and the poem express that feeling of useless dedication to a set pattern, even with nobody to see, really made me struggle to process just how much really goes on beyond human perception. the building's self destruction, much like the nuclear bomb that wiped out its former residents, paints a strong, almost human image of fear and struggle by the house. but its not. its only what we,humans, and the author put into words about something mechanical. set to an objective, with no sign of stopping until its certain mechanical suicide.
regardless, school is going well, im working on finishing up the alien series, and i think i might like somebody (50/50 chance after 8 years). ellen ripley is hot. good night
note: the story is definitely popular. regardless it is fire
note: mmm yummy dirt dirt i lvoe eating dirt WHO THE FUCK JUST OPENED THE FREEZER ITS 11
first week of school almost done....................... yay...................... also these entries will probably be getting very short unless i feel like yapping my flaps off into space GOOD BYE
i forgot about this blog..........
school is going well but i have like no more than 1 friend per class and apparently people just DONT WANT TO SIT NEXT TO ME!!!!!!! which is crazy cuz im awesome and cool and approachable all the time! im considering starting roller blading i guess but other than that i have like nothing else to talk about
buhbye
i have a carrd,too.
(its a bit more organized,click text above)
first off thank you i didnt think people would see my site! I cant reply to comments right now because my account isnt old enough yet. (im typing right now wait for updates)
i have a few different recommendations for kpop (usually more electronic/upbeat/rnb pop).(preface: i dont know much about the specific names of genres. i just like a lot of music :))
for more pop-like music (or just other artists i cant categorize) try:
the holographc text was something i discovered by accident while looking for another tutorial - but here's the one i used!
(click the last bit of that sentence)
i found gifs on pinterest to use as the background. for gifs like those, i suggest looking for "fractal gifs" (or just holographic ones).
day twoooooooooo school starts tomorrow and i dont have an outfit for picture day . i forgot to do laundry
topic two i have an android phone. overnight it recived an update and i expected it to fix literally all the problems it has. but instead it just pulled up some gemini AI bullshit?? i am so fucking tired of this omg nobody neeeeeds any of this. innovation is amazing and all but if you shove your AI assistant down my throat and out my ass im not using it
oohhhhh you want to use my new assistabt ooooooohhhhhhhh you neeeedddd my new AI please invest plssssplsssss oh pleASE oh please will you investttt :(((
deadass i could rant about how useless and annoying AI is (and will be) for hours on end. in the world we live in, we're investing in stupid neural networks instead of free housing and accessibility. dumbest shit ever and both presidents piss me AWF i know one has better advertising towards a younger audience. which is fine. but no matter who is voted another fat HUNK of taxpayer money is thrown to israel like peanuts to a circus elephant.
this is just making me upset im gonna rant about kpop
it really irritates me how avoidant people are nowadays about giving things a chance. kpop especially has seen a rise in popularity, but people refuse to go deeper than the surface level big3 groups. I promise you'll be so much happier given the chance to look around and find what you like.
many popular groups now are debuting/coming back with strong impressions, but with a lack of integrity to their concept. hiring professional photographers (mainly cho gi-seok) does provide good hype for the release, especially to annoying people like me, but it can let people down not to make the music match what was promised. to people like me, theming and consistency is SO important aqnd i really wish entertainment companies would experiment with more genres more often (other than noise music and whatever tyla releases(no shade i love her)).
while western influence has been a thing since the beginning of the industry in the early 90s/late 80s, the actual modern influences in question have watered down the creativity of some genres. For example, early (recession) pop was much more broad, raunchy, and experimental, while now its difficult to find pure pop music with passionate producers. (shoutout chappell roan we might b4e back) and while i see some amazing producers in kpop (like full8loom), they almost always go to lesser known or "forgotten" groups (shoutout wjsn). I wish it wasnt such a curse for intricate productions to go under the radar.
hoollyy shitt the yappinator HOMOTRON 9000 over HERE...
hello and welcome to the very first post on my stuopid website neocities thing hufshjdlfkjhslkjfhlskjhdflkjhsljkdhflkjhkhjcnccnnnnsruewouryosfhikuhdsfkj I will write here about my interests, recent activities, and ramblings i will also likely forget about this in a week thxthx
I am starting sophomore year in two days.I don't feel as nervous about it as i thought i would. I tri3ed to contact my counselor to move my gym class to the last period, but the slots were full so she put it as my second to last, before study period. I'm not mad, really. as long as i have a chance at the end of the day to be alone and focus on relaxing, i can deal with it. I dont share any periods (that i know of) with my friend yet. i have other friends, but she seems to care the mmost.
I feel nervous about school photos though. the one i had last year was humiliating and the worst part is that it was cast onto the board nearly every day in math. i had such a dumb smile on, i didnt know how to dress, and my hair was flat. i also had the picture taken right there in the office with its horrible lighting. i didnt even know my ID photo was being taken that day. on another note, i ahve been feeling better recently. over time i have realized that i am stronger than i thought before. my tolerance is getting better, and embarrassment is a LITTLE less of an issue. its still bad.
this page isnt finished at all and i only started learning to use HTML today. forgive me if its fugly
PLEASE if you are any of the 200 people who saw this LOOK AWAY!! EVERYTHING IS A PLACEHOLDER!!! GET AWAYY!!!!!!!!! :/